Rape is a crime. But insistent or awkward flirting is not a crime, nor is chivalry a macho aggression.
In the wake of the Weinstein affair, there has been a legitimate awareness of sexual violence against women, particularly in the professional context, where some men abuse their power. It was necessary. But this liberation of the word is now turning into its opposite: we are told to speak as we should, to keep quiet about what makes us angry, and those who refuse to comply with such injunctions are seen as traitors, as accomplices!
But it is the very essence of puritanism to borrow, in the name of a supposed general good, the arguments of the protection of women and their emancipation to better chain them to a status of eternal victims, poor little things under the influence of phallocrats, as in the good old days of witchcraft.
Denunciations and indictments
In fact, #metoo has led to a campaign of denunciations and public indictments in the press and on social networks of individuals who, without being given the opportunity neither to answer nor to defend themselves, have been put on exactly the same level as sexual abusers. This expeditious justice has already had its victims, men sanctioned in the exercise of their profession, forced to resign, etc., when their only fault was to have touched a knee, tried to steal a kiss, talked about "intimate" things at a professional dinner or to have sent messages with sexual connotations to a woman for whom the attraction was not mutual.
This fever to send "pigs" to the slaughterhouse, far from helping women to empower themselves, actually serves the interests of the enemies of sexual freedom, religious extremists, the worst reactionaries and those who believe, in the name of a substantial conception of the good and the Victorian morality that goes with it, that women are beings "apart", children with an adult face, demanding to be protected.
On the other hand, the men are summoned to beat their chests and find, in the depths of their retrospective conscience, an "inappropriate behavior" that they might have had ten, twenty or thirty years ago, and for which they should repent. The public confession, the incursion of self-appointed prosecutors into the private sphere, creates a climate of totalitarian society.
The purifying wave seems to know no limits. Here, a nude by Egon Schiele is censored on a poster; here, a painting by Balthus is called for removal from a museum on the grounds that it would be an apology for pedophilia; in the confusion of man and work, a request is made to ban the Roman Polanski retrospective at the Cinémathèque and the retrospective devoted to Jean-Claude Brisseau is postponed. An academic judges the film Blow-Up, by Michelangelo Antonioni, "misogynistic" and "unacceptable". In the light of this revisionism, John Ford (The Prisoner of the Desert) and even Nicolas Poussin (The Rape of the Sabine Women) are not doing well.
Already, publishers are asking some of us to make our male characters less "sexist", to talk about sexuality and love with less excessiveness, or to make the "traumas suffered by the female characters" more obvious! On the verge of ridicule, a bill in Sweden wants to impose explicitly notified consent to any candidate for sexual intercourse! One more effort and two adults who want to sleep together will have to check a document on their phone in which the practices they accept and those they refuse will be duly listed.
Indispensable freedom to offend
The philosopher Ruwen Ogien defended a freedom to offend that is essential to artistic creation.
In the same way, we defend a freedom to annoy, essential to sexual freedom. We are today sufficiently informed to admit that the sexual impulse is by nature offensive and wild, but we are also sufficiently clear-sighted not to confuse awkward flirting with sexual aggression.
Above all, we are aware that the human person is not monolithic: a woman can, in the same day, lead a professional team and enjoy being the sexual object of a man, without being a "slut" or a vile accomplice of patriarchy. She can ensure that her salary is equal to that of a man, but not feel forever traumatized by a rubbing in the subway, even if it is considered a crime. She may even see it as an expression of great sexual misery, or even as a non-event.
As women, we do not recognize ourselves in this feminism which, beyond the denunciation of the abuse of power, takes the face of a hatred of men and sexuality. We think that the freedom to say no to a sexual proposal does not go without the freedom to importune.
And we consider that it is necessary to know how to answer to this freedom to importune differently than by locking oneself in the role of the prey.
For those of us who have chosen to have children, we feel it is best to raise our daughters to be informed and aware enough to live their lives fully without being intimidated or made to feel guilty.
The accidents that can happen to a woman's body do not necessarily affect her dignity and should not, no matter how hard they may be, necessarily make her a perpetual victim. For we are not reducible to our bodies. Our inner freedom is inviolable. And this freedom that we cherish is not without risks and responsibilities.
The editors of this text are : Sarah Chiche (writer, clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst), Catherine Millet (art critic, writer), Catherine Robbe-Grillet (actress and writer), Peggy Sastre (author, journalist and translator), Abnousse Shalmani (writer and journalist).
Other members of this forum are: Kathy Alliou (curator), Marie-Laure Bernadac (honorary general curator), Stéphanie Blake (author of children's books), Ingrid Caven (actress and singer), Catherine Deneuve (actress), Gloria Friedmann (visual artist), Cécile Guilbert (writer), Brigitte Jaques-Wajeman (director), Claudine Junien (geneticist), Brigitte Lahaie (actress and radio presenter), Elisabeth Lévy Elisabeth Lévy (editor of Causeur), Joëlle Losfeld (publisher), Sophie de Menthon (president of the ETHIC movement), Marie Sellier (author, president of the Société des gens de lettres).n the same way, we defend a freedom to annoy, essential to sexual freedom. We are today sufficiently informed to admit that the sexual impulse is by nature offensive and wild, but we are also sufficiently clear-sighted not to confuse awkward flirting with sexual aggression.
Above all, we are aware that the human person is not monolithic: a woman can, in the same day, lead a professional team and enjoy being the sexual object of a man, without being a "slut" or a vile accomplice of patriarchy. She can ensure that her salary is equal to that of a man, but not feel forever traumatized by a rubbing in the subway, even if it is considered a crime. She may even see it as an expression of great sexual misery, or even as a non-event.
As women, we do not recognize ourselves in this feminism which, beyond the denunciation of the abuse of power, takes the face of a hatred of men and sexuality. We think that the freedom to say no to a sexual proposal does not go without the freedom to importune.
And we consider that it is necessary to know how to answer to this freedom to importune differently than by locking oneself in the role of the prey.
For those of us who have chosen to have children, we feel it is best to raise our daughters to be informed and aware enough to live their lives fully without being intimidated or made to feel guilty.
The accidents that can happen to a woman's body do not necessarily affect her dignity and should not, no matter how hard they may be, necessarily make her a perpetual victim. For we are not reducible to our bodies. Our inner freedom is inviolable. And this freedom that we cherish is not without risks and responsibilities.
The editors of this text are : Sarah Chiche (writer, clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst), Catherine Millet (art critic, writer), Catherine Robbe-Grillet (actress and writer), Peggy Sastre (author, journalist and translator), Abnousse Shalmani (writer and journalist).
Other members of this forum are: Kathy Alliou (curator), Marie-Laure Bernadac (honorary general curator), Stéphanie Blake (author of children's books), Ingrid Caven (actress and singer), Catherine Deneuve (actress), Gloria Friedmann (visual artist), Cécile Guilbert (writer), Brigitte Jaques-Wajeman (director), Claudine Junien (geneticist), Brigitte Lahaie (actress and radio presenter), Elisabeth Lévy Elisabeth Lévy (editor of Causeur), Joëlle Losfeld (publisher), Sophie de Menthon (president of the ETHIC movement), Marie Sellier (author, president of the Société des gens de lettres).
